Nov. 24 :: No One on the Corner Has Swagga Like Us

In honor of the Wings only visit to Hotlanta this year, I present good friends of mine: The Swagger Crew

WHAT’S ALL THIS THEN?
The Wings make their one and only trip to the Dirty Dirty this season: 7pm, Wednesday.

WHAT’S THE BIG IDEA?
Detroit finished their season-long six-game homestand collecting ELEVEN out of a possible twelve points. That’s nasty.

NOW WHERE WERE WE?
It’s been a year — almost to the day — since the Wings and Thrashers met. On November 25th, 2009, the Wings were shutout at home by Atlanta: 2-0. Missing from the lineup was Andreas Lilja, Valtteri Filppula, Johan Franzen, Jason Williams, and Niklas Kronwall.

OH, HI AGAIN
There are no former Red Wings on the Thrashers now that Slava Kozlov has moved on — but you may remember Brent Sopel from the tryout he was on, until he signed with the Chicago Blackhawks without telling the Red Wings…on the day that the Wings and Hawks played a pre-season game against one another. He gets a pass for being an awesome sport, and holding up his end of the bargain, riding in the Gay Pride Parade with the Stanley Cup — AFTER the Blackhawks had traded him.

MEMBA ME?!
There are no former Thrashers in Detroit.

BEST NAME NOMINEE
You’d be hard pressed to find a cooler name than Aleksandr Burmistrov. Speaking of which, keep your eyeballs on him (he’s #8), because that kid is damn good. Though Burmistrov is this edition’s winner, there are plenty of awesome names in that dressing room: Evander Kane, Dustin Byfuglien, Johnny “I Do” Oduya, and Ondrej Pavelec. Too bad cool names don’t win you hockey games.

THEIR LAST GAMES
:: The Wings held a hell of a rally, taking back their Sunday matinee from the Calgary Flames, 5-4 in overtime.
:: Atlanta defeated the Islanders 2-1 in overtime on Sunday, handing the Islanders their 400th straight loss.

EXPECTED LINEUP
Zetterberg — Datsyuk — Holmstrom
Franzen — Modano — Cleary
Scuttles — Flip — Thunderchief
Gator — Helm — Miller

Lidstrom — Stuart
Rafalski — Rigbox
Potter — Cirque

Tiberius
Joey Mac

Scratches
Jakub “Took a Look in the Mirror, Said What Up” Kindl [for @seangentille]
Jiri “Cream on the Inside, Clean on the Outside” Hudler [just a hunch…no intel]

Injuries
Kris “Try to Copy My Swagga, I’m on that Next Shit Now” Draper [groin]
Chris “Yeah Buddy, Rollin’ Like a Big Shot. Chevy Tuned Up Like a Nascar Pit Stop” Osgood [groin]
also….
Chris “Lean Back, Right Hand on the Pinewood” Osgood

Honorable Mentions
Brett “Swagga On a Hundred, Thousand, Trillion” Lebda
Jonathan “Wake Up and be the Shit and the Urine Na Na Na” Ericsson
Niklas “Can’t Wear Skinny Jeans Cuz My Nuts Don’t Fit” Kronwall
Nicklas “No Exaggeration Necessary, Living Revolutionary, Nothing Less Than Legendary” Lidstrom
Patrick “Gangsta Shit Hereditary, Got it from My Dad” Eaves
Ville “If He Get Outta Line, His Feelings Finna Get Hurt” Leino
Chris “I Ain’t in the Game Still, Imma Problem On the Low” Chelios
Marian “Smell Money in the Air Soon as I Roll Up” Hossa
Jiri “Jumpin’ In and Outta Bitches Like I’m Playin’ Hopscotch” Hudler
Todd “Flow Sick Crazy Deranged Need Counselin'” Bertuzzi
Derek “Only Time You Make It Rain When You Throwin’ Change in a Fountain” Meech
Henrik “Don’t Fuck With Me, Cuz Right Now I’m Higher Than Captain Kirk” Zetterberg
Andreas “I’ll Snatch… Her Purse” Lilja
Andreas “Screens on the Dash Watchin’ Saved By the Bell, Got a House by the Bayside” Lilja
Aaron “Trunk Hit Hard Like Kimbo Slice” Downey
Jason “Make It Move Like U-Haul” Williams

THE FIVE HOLE
1. For the second game in a row, one team gave up a late regulation goal before succumbing to an overtime loss. This time, the Wings were able to capitalize on the late outburst, riding noting but momentum to a late win. Everyone (minus Todd Bertuzzi) looked like they were willing that win against the Flames, and if they can ride that feeling through the rest of the month, the Wings should have themselves sitting pretty after 25-ish games.
2. Dan Cleary left Sunday’s game and didn’t return — which had everyone’s sphincters puckered up somethin’ fierce. Luckily, he’s okay and was held out just as a precaution. He’ll be back in tonight and — if he continues to play as he has been — will continue to be a force to be reckoned with.
3. Todd Bertuzzi had an 09-like game against Calgary, and you know I’m going to jump all over him if he plays like that again. He gets a pass because he’s played overwhelmingly strong all year, but he’s gotta make that dumbass pass into the corner in overtime…or go off-side at wholly inopportune times…
4. Jimmy Howard has let in a few softies over the last few games, and I’m sure he’s more pissed off about it than you are. He’ll rebound and play it strong tonight.
5. No bullshit: having met the kids that make up Swagger Crew when I was filming for The Travel Channel, I’m proud to call them friends. They’re awesome men and women, unreal dancers, consummate professionals, and classic showmen. Check them out on Facebook and watch the following video from America’s Best Dance Crew. They may not have won the damn thing, but they were always fun:

WHAT WE LEARNED AGAINST THE FLAMES
Darren Helm in overtime. That’s what.

7 thoughts on “Nov. 24 :: No One on the Corner Has Swagga Like Us”

  1. I also like Hainsey’s name, just because he already has a nickname built in.

    The Ice Cream Paint Job song is one of only like 3 that our athletic department knows exist as a song.

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