The Unders Have It :: Quincey suspended 1 game

On Sunday afternoon, the Wings needed a shootout to defeat the Florida Panthers 2-1. They played most of the third and overtime with only five defensemen after Kyle Quincey was ejected for an elbow to the head of Tomas Kopecky. He received a five-minute major and an additional ten minute misconduct.

The National Hockey League determined that his action warranted at least a further look, and potentially a suspension — and scheduled a hearing for 1:00pm this afternoon. When the verdict was finally rendered, it was revealed that discipline czar Brendan Shanahan has suspended Kyle Quincey for : Wednesday’s game against the division champion Blues.

Earlier in the day, we used Twitter to poll the masses. We started the over/under at 1.5 games, but seeing as how 100% of folks thought he’d get at least two, we upped the line to 2.5. The vast majority thought three, and a handful thought a bit longer. With the relative leniency Shanahan has been showing as the season wears down – not to mention Tomas Kopecky was (thankfully) not injured on the play, we thought that maybe he’d get away with two or fewer. Once it was announced that it was a single game… everyone was shocked.

To watch Brendan Shanahan’s video explaining the suspension, click here to go to .

Quincey joins fellow blueliner Brendan Smith on the list of suspended Red Wings during the 2011-12 season. Smith received five regular season games after making contact with the head of Ben Smith during the pre-season. This was the first disciplinary action for Kyle Quincey, which very likely played into the low end of the suspension spectrum (suspectrum?).

He was in the defenseman rotation as it was, and his play has been slightly lacking since the initial thumbs up had worn off. He’ll be a restricted free agent at the end of the season 福汇官网 and will likely be seeking a similar salary to the one he’s making now ($3.25M). Speaking of cash, Quincey will forfeit $16,892, which will be added to the player’s emergency fund.

Photo Credit: Getty Images, courtesy of

Why not – Darren Helm to miss 4-6 weeks

Add another body to the growing injured list. Darren Helm, who sustained an apparent leg injury in a collision with San Jose’s Dominic Moore and limped off the ice, has had an MRI performed on his left knee. A “” was detected and he’s been shut down for 4-6 weeks.

With only ten games left, Helm is on the shelf for the rest of the regular season. Even on the lower end of that range, he’ll likely miss the first round of the playoffs. Joy!

The Red Wings are already without a bevy of players:

Patrick Eaves, injured November 26th when he took a Roman Josi puck to the jaw against Nashville. The jaw is healed, but he’s suffering from post-concussive symptoms. He is unlikely to return at all.

Jonathan Ericsson, injured February 25th gloving down a clear against Colorado. An x-ray revealed a fracture, and he was expected back at the end of this month. He should return in time for the playoffs.

Nicklas Lidstrom, injured February 25th when blocking a shot against Colorado. He finished the game, but tests have revealed a “deep bone bruise” in his ankle. shadowsocks He has begun practicing, but “doesn’t look close,” according to Coach Babcock. Hopefully he’ll be back in the lineup in a week or so.

Jakub Kindl, injured March 4th against Chicago. His strained oblique muscle has kept him out of the lineup for 7 games, but should be returning soon. Doug Janik will be returned to Grand Rapids when Kindl can enter the lineup.

Joey MacDonald, injured March 14th against Anaheim. He has been having back spasms and was undergoing tests today. Jordan Pearce has been called up from Grand Rapids, but it looks like we’ll be riding Jimmy Howard as much as possible.

Johan Franzen, injured March 16th at practice. Like MacDonald, he’s having back spasms and will be re-evaluated today. He is out tonight against Washington.

That’s seven players. Replacing them in the lineup are Brendan Smith, Gustav Nyquist, Doug Janik, Jordan Pearce, and Jan Mursak. When the playoffs begin, most of these guys should be set to return, but it’s worth keeping an eye on.

Photo Credit: Rick Stewart, Getty Images

Eaves to IR, Conner called up

On Saturday, Red Wings winger Patrick Eaves took an errant shot just above the right ear. It was a scary scene as Eaves went down in a heap, appeared to lose consciousness for just a second, before writhing in pain on the ice. He was able to get himself onto a gurney — for the most part — and be taken to the hospital, where he was held overnight for observation after confirming that his jaw was fractured by the Roman Josi shot that likely ramped up a stick. After a successful surgery where his jaw was wired shut, it was determined that he will miss the next six to eight weeks.

Despite being ruled out until mid-January, Eaves had not been placed on injured reserve.

Until just now. According to a team official, Eaves has been removed from the active roster, and added to the short-term injured reserve list, joining Jan Mursak who is on LTIR (he’s set to return from a broken ankle at the end of December). Players placed on STIR must miss seven days, but Eaves will not be physically able to perform for at least twenty-five games, according to the timeline.

With Eaves coming off of the roster, the team is back down to 22 active players. The team has also announced that they’ve recalled Chris Conner from the Grand Rapids Griffins.

The Griffins leading scorer is the veteran pro and Michigan native. He has 7 goals and 16 points in 20 games, good enough for sixth in AHL scoring. Conner played 60 games with the Penguins last season, netting 7 goals and 9 assists. In total, he’s played 139 games in the NHL and was signed this past July for depth and in case the Wings needed a solid pro during the season.

It appears that time is now. Conner will be eligible to suit up for the Red Wings on Friday evening, when they take on the Sabres. The team must be really unhappy with Fabian Brunnstrom’s performance tonight… discuss.

Potential dates for Patrick Eaves’ return
:: January 12 vs. Phoenix
:: January 14 vs. Chicago
:: January 16 vs. Buffalo
:: January 17 at Dallas
:: January 19 at Phoenix
:: January 21 vs. Columbus
:: January 23 vs. St. Louis

Potential dates for Jan Mursak’s return
:: December 26 at Nashville
:: December 27 vs. St. Louis
:: December 30 at Chicago
:: December 31 vs. St. Louis
:: January 3 at Dallas
:: January 7 at Toronto

Photo Credit: Duane Burleson, AP

White out 1-2 Weeks, Smith Recalled, Bertuzzi placed on STIR

Per Detroit Red Wings release, the team has made a few roster changes today.

First of all, heavy-sacked hero Ian White, who blocked a Jamie Benn shot with his face on Saturday night, received several stitches and was taken for further medical evaluation after the game. He will miss a week or two with a fractured right cheekbone. Mike Commodore will take his place in the lineup in the immediate future.

Next, Brendan Smith has been called up from Grand Rapids. He will serve the final game of his suspension on Tuesday night against St. Louis. His status for the road trip will be determined after the game — he’ll either be returned to Grand Rapids (with his suspension completely served so that he can be called up if another defenseman goes down with an injured) or will remain with the Red Wings for the trip to California.

Finally, to make room on the roster for Brendan Smith, someone had to be placed on injured reserve. Todd Bertuzzi, who has been absent since taking a stick to the face by Minnesota’s Devin Setoguchi and has been suffering from flu-like symptoms related to a swollen inner-ear, will be placed on short-term injured reserve, meaning he will be forced to sit out seven days. He can be placed on STIR retroactively, meaning he’s essentially already served his seven games and can be reactivated whenever his health condition improves.

Got all that?! The Chart has been updated to reflect all of the changes.

For He’s a Jolly Good Fellow

The best present
You don't want to know what I had to do to get those.

I always forget that Darren Helm is six months younger than I am. Welcome to age 24, love, you’re off to a great start.

I have to say, when he got smacked earlier in the game, I was frozen with horror. I think I made a few whimpering noises and tweeted some incomprehensible. We certainly don’t need anymore injuries, and especially not one of our most effective forwards. I breathed a sigh of relief when I saw the number 43 back on the ice. And when he scored the game winner in OT… well, I don’t think that I should be telling the internet about that reaction.

Now that he’s found those hands, I hope to see them used more frequently. I can’t wait.


The Red Wings will be without center Mike Modano, who is “out indefinitely” after suffering a lacerated tendon in the right wrist during Friday night’s game against the Blue Jackets. Extra special thanks to Fox Sports Blohio, who didn’t even bother to show a replay and offered only a fleeting “a Red Wing is heading to the dressing room” before moving onto something about the rich history of hockey in Columbus.

All signs point to Modano being out for a few months, solving the Hudler/Miller/Eaves rotation problem for a few games — at least until Kris Draper returns from his torn groin, who is expected to join the team next week. From the sound of reports, Blue Jackets forward R.J. Umberger’s skate caught Modano’s wrist. He winced in pain as he changed into street clothes and headed back to Detroit with the rest of the team. He underwent surgery Saturday morning to repair the tendon, and look into some nerve damage.

If Modano is unable to return to the lineup before January 22nd, he’ll fail to make at least one of his performance bonuses — one that would pay him $100,000 for appearing in 55 games this season.

Justin Abdelkader will take Mike Modano’s spot as the third line center, but we all know how long we should expect line tweaks to last. Jiri Hudler (wut?) will take Modano’s spot on the point of the second power play.


What do this outfit and the story have in common? They're both TERRIBLE fucking ideas.

Alternate title (h/t @mserven): “HIDE YO KIDS, HIDE YO VETS”

Very troubling news just came streaming down the RWFeed… well, not so much troubling as “aw that’s nice” with a sprinkle of “oh shit, they let him near children?”

As part of a state-wide tour, a handful of Red Wings are visiting schools and hospitals, hangin’ out with the kids and veterans and definitely not attacking them from behind.

Justin Adbelkader and Drew Miller are going to (wait for it…) East Lansing and Muskegon. Homer, Nick Lidstrom, and Patty Eaves are going to spend some time in Grand Rapids before meeting up with the aforementioned Spartans. Darren Helm, Tiberius Howard, newbie (I hope he’s hazed) Mike Modano, and THE SHETUZZ are checking out Flint and Saginaw.

But the real story here is that someone from PR thought that Todd Bertuzzi’s gap-toothed face wouldn’t scare the ever-loving bejesus out of children in Flint and veterans in Saginaw.

Here are a list of things that I assume are less frightening to third graders — feel free to add to this list in the comments:

1. Chucky.
2. The boogie man.
3. Spiders.
4. Chelsea Handler.
5. Pedo Bear.

Rest in Peace, Probie

On Monday, Hockeytown lost a legend.

No, his number won’t join Stevie and Gordie in the rafters. But anyone who was a Wings fan in mid-80’s to mid-90’s will remember — fondly — what Bob Probert brought to the game. He was the ultimate teammate, a hell of a brawler, and an oddly efficient goal-scorer.

There was a time, when I was in fifth grade, that Bob Probert and Tie Domi fought. I know, that doesn’t sound that odd because they went thirteen times over their illustrious, blood-shedding careers. But this time, PASS Sports (remember PASS Sports?) had a punch-tracker ready to go before the fists began flying. A mini-scoreboard on the lower portion of the television screen, allowing all of us at home to experience every punch as Probie did. And, for whatever reason, we all felt like we battled with him.

But he was more than just an enforcer, or a tough guy. I’m not sure there’s been a more blue-collar guy in a blue-collar town like Detroit. He wasn’t untouchable in the way that Steve Yzerman was but he was special. The fans had a connection with the man, not just the player. He had more than his fair share of off-ice issues (which, strangely, I think made him more endearing to the fans — as opposed to a villain in our eyes), but we’re not here to talk about those. There will be plenty said along those lines.

Instead, we celebrate Mr. Probert’s life and career. He scored 162 goals in the NHL — ONE HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO — and spent 3300 minutes in the box, which is equivalent to 2.29 DAYS. What’s more, nearly every single one of those minutes was served on behalf of a teammate and friend. Players have come and gone — some more popular and infamous than others — but few have come close to having the kind of worship that Bob Probert did.

Most importantly, he left behind four children and a legacy.

I’m looking forward to the first game at the Joe next season. Anyone who knows anything about modern Red Wings history will begin the Probie chant right around “gave proof through the night” — and it will thoroughly drown out “the home of the brave.”

We lost a good one. He was a hard-nosed, bruised-knuckled, soft-handed, Bruise Brother son of a bitch that proudly wore the Winged Wheel for nine years — and the Blackhawk logo for seven. By all accounts, he was a hell of a man, a funny locker room presence, and a kind-hearted soul.

From The Production Line to the Probert family and our brothers and sisters in Hockeytown, our thoughts are with you.

Despite signing in June, Todd finds a way…

Tuzz, seen here molesting an eventual-teammate

Gather ’round, boys and girls, it’s story time.

It started on a Tuesday. This past Tuesday, as a matter of fact. We’re just under eight weeks away from exchanging vows, and everything was on the up and up. We have quite a bit left to do, but the big, important things — venues, food, guest lists, invitations, etc — were all done. Tucked away into a neat little box. Plenty of little things left to accomplish — Engelbert bowls, for one — but we could rest easy knowing that, even if we didn’t do anything else before August 7th, we’d have an awesome party on our hands.

And then, at 9pm Tuesday evening, the phone rang. We lost our caterer. Something about embezzlement and jailsex or something. Within 24 hours, Todd Bertuzzi had re-signed with the Red Wings for two years and a TWENTY NINE PERCENT RAISE!

An unfortunate coincidence?  Nay.

Bertuzzi’s agent/Satan’s helper Pat Morris threw out a ridiculous number — two years and $3.875M — in hopes that negotiations could be stalled until seven Saturdays from now, when Todd’s Operation: Fuck You Janov-Petrella Wedding could be executed. In a surprising turn of events, the recently re-signed Ken Holland and Jim Nill — who have always had my back, they’re my homeys — wouldn’t allow such things to transpire.


There’s no other way to look at it, folks. Our fantastic general managers jumped on a mighty big (not to mention mighty slow, mighty wobbly, mighty gap-toothed) grenade for me and my bride. It’s the true character of the Red Wings organization. How many weddings have Stan Bowman and Ray Shero saved from disaster?

Zero, that’s how many.

Point is — in order to make the deal happen this early, and to appease the Dark Lord (presumably), some facet of our wedding plans had to be destroyed. Holland and Nill are fantastic men, but gods they are not. Allegedly.

A cap hit of $1.9375M over the next two seasons. He’ll earn $2.25M this season (150% of his salary from a year ago)  before dropping into $1.625M for 2011-12 (still 8% higher than 09-10). In terms of numbers, dollars, and cents — the cap hit might not be too far off if we can guarantee 15-19 goals (see what I did there, Andy?) and 40 points each of the next two seasons — and the chemistry with Henrik Zetterberg and Valterri Filppula is undeniable. But that’s like saying “whoa this sausage really goes well with bacon and eggs.” Of course it does. But have you ever looked at sausage by itself? It’s fucking disgusting.

GRIDDLECAKES SIGNS ON (aka, continuing the breakfast theme)
Valtteri Filppula’s older brother has been signed to a one-year, two-way deal with the Red Wings. At first glace, this move seemed little more than depth signing for Grand Rapids — and a potential call-up in a pinch — but all of a sudden, with Todd Bertuzzi’s contract sinking the ship that seemed so happily afloat, Ilari Filppula has a chance to wedge himself onto the big club.

I still think that’s a long-shot, given his age and pro experience up to this point. Nevertheless, he’ll be given a shot in training camp and if October rolls around with two Filppulas on the roster, prepare to be out-prettied. I’m looking at you, Todd.

As has been speculated for weeks now, both of our top-flight general managers, Ken Holland and Jim Nill, have been signed to long-term extensions to remain in their respective capacities. Five-year extensions, which kick in next season, guarantee that our men in charge will most likely last longer than Nick Lidstrom’s contract after-all.

If either or both guys decide they’ve had enough hockey and hang up their clipboards, there’s a guy in Tampa that might be available for the job. He’s new, but I hear good things.

Continuing the good news, Red Wings capologist Ryan Martin decided to stick around instead of joining good friend Steve Yzerman. First order of business: allow the Bertuzzi deal to happen. Bang up job, Ry.

All jokes aside, it’s a great bit of news — the Martin part — and it should mean continued excellence in the cap-manipulating department.

Speaking of which, here’s where we stand — with all one-way players listed:

G :: Howard, Osgood [2,133,333]
D :: Lidstrom, Rafalski, Kronwall, Stuart, Ericsson, Kindl [20,683,333]
F :: Datsyuk, Zetterberg, Franzen, Filppula, Cleary, Hudler, Bertuzzi, Holmstrom, Draper, Ritola [32,175,378]

Total salary dedicated to 18 players is $54,142,044. The cap is expected to increase to somewhere in the $58M’s, so the Wings have $3.8 – $4.6M to spend (depending on the actual cap number) on the following holes:

:: A sixth/seventh defenseman, depending on what role Jakub Kindl earns during training camp. Doug Janik can drop in — as can Brendan Smith, but that’s unlikely given the Red Wings desire to over-ripen prospects in the AHL. It seems all but official that Andreas Lilja is out, unless he takes a drastic pay-cut to remain a Red Wing. Good news, everyone! Derek Meech might be back because he never bitches, always takes an insanely low salary, and is a forward sub when needed. Expect whoever takes this slot to slide in around $750-$850k tops.

:: Three or four bottom half forwards. There are plenty of restricted free agents in need of new contracts, so it’s safe to assume many of them will fill out the roster. Darren Helm (who is probably next in line for a deal), Justin Abdelkader, Patrick Eaves, and Drew Miller would make 14 forwards. It’s just a matter of numbers now. After that seventh defenseman mentioned above, there will be about $3M — maybe $4M — to get all four under contract. Drew Miller may be the odd man out, and Patrick Eaves might not want to take a near-league minimum contract again.

If we use the numbers I predicted a few weeks ago, signing the fab four will cost somewhere in the neighborhood of $3.1M. Here’s hoping, because they all deserve deals and looked good in red and white.

Photo Credit: Jeff McIntosh, AP


I’m going to do my best to take the high road, and avoid mentioning that — for the first time since President Kennedy went back and to the left — the Chicago Blackhawks have temporarily stepped out of the land of perpetual mediocrity to win the Stanley Cup by beating the seven seed from the Leastern Conference. It is their fourth in team history – tied for dead last among Original Six teams, and with the Red Wings since, ya know, 13 years ago.

Congratulations to a place I called home for five years, Scotty Bowman, and all nine Blackhawk fans. Enjoy the rush — you’ve earned the celebration. This summer will be a nightmare for the roster, but for now — it’s all about never having to hear about Marian Goddamn Hossa ever again.

So ends the 2009-10 NHL season. It was a heartbreaker as a Red Wings fan — particularly watching a division rival eventually take home the Cup.

Tomorrow: Off-Season. 99 days until training camp opens.